CATS IN MY GARDEN

  • I should take my cat as an example: he sees everything, but he does not let himself be upset by anything; it might sound like indifference, but I think it’s just immense wisdom. Yes, because a cat is fine alone, it is fully satisfied with itself, yet it deeply loves caresses, but above all it is not afraid to ask for it. And with great class he knows how to exploit every empty corner to obtain comfort. It is the perfect balance between curiosity and tranquility, between loneliness and company, love and selfishness: his is simple selfishness disguised as love … or maybe it’s pure love disguised as selfishness.
A Pet’s Last Will and Testament

Before humans die, they write their last will and testament, give their home and all they have to those they leave behind. If, with my paws, I could do the same, this is what I’d ask…

To a poor and lonely stray I’d give my happy home; my bowl and cozy bed, soft pillow and all my toys; the lap which I loved so much; the hand that stroked my fur; and the sweet voice that spoke my name.

I’d will to the sad, scared shelter pet the place I had in my human’s loving heart, of which there seemed no bounds.

So, when I die, please do not say, “I will never have a pet again, for the loss and pain is more than I can stand.”

Instead, go find an unloved pet, one whose life has held no joy or hope, and give my place to him.

This is the only thing I can give…

The love I left behind
I know that Nano will not live forever, I know that his time on earth, like everyone else, is limited. I know that I cannot work miracles, nor invent amazing cures, and that this cat has had HIV for years. I know that the past does not go back, and that the living organism of each of us deteriorates month by month, year after year, continuously. I have studied general pathology and biology, and I am now studying degenerative and infectious diseases and pathologies affecting internal organs. And even a child knows that at some point each of us will no longer be on this earth. However, no matter how much I think about it, and repeat it to me, and tell me that I must be prepared, that that moment will happen, in a day not far away, that it is nothing but the passing of life, the natural cycle of each one. our. It doesn’t matter that if I think about it clearly it’s all right, and it’s all scientific and sequential. Because as soon as I stop to really think about that day, and the lack of Nano from my life, and his non-presence, and the fact that he will be gone from that day until the end of my days, I feel like I’m dying. I feel an anguish so enormous, immense, atrocious, crushing and suffocating, that it seems to me that I too am dying a bit. It seems to me that I can no longer breathe, that my chest is heavy, that my pleurae are squeezing my lungs, that my mind is leaving me. It is an intolerable idea to remain without a part of my life and without a life partner as faithful as he has been over the years.
I know death, I have seen it several times during my internship. I saw life leave a creature: the exact, precise moment in which that animal was there, and the second after when everything stopped. Being and not being. The presence and absence of life, with no return. And every time, however absurd it is, it remains terrible. And the most terrible thing is that I will be alone even in that moment, because no one around me understands even remotely what he means to me, and what we have been all our life. Nobody will care, neither about him nor the pain that I already know will swallow me. And I just want someone who could give me a hug that day, or a sign of humanity and a shoulder to cry on. And instead there will be nothing but emptiness. And he, my shoulder to cry on, my little great strength, will be gone. I will be even more alone than now, alone even in elaborating the definitive absence of a feline brother whom I have loved more than many human people in my life. This time I’m really afraid of getting lost in too devastating a pain.

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