CATCH THE NIGHT

I always saw myself as a safety net for all the people I knew. I have always tried to cushion everyone’s fall, even those who do not know how they ended up on the net. Then one day I realized that I can’t spend my whole life cushioning the falls of others, because the one who gets hurt in the end is always me, tense and waiting. Becoming aware of your limits is perhaps one of the most powerful and at the same time debilitating things that can exist. You understand that you are not Atlas, that you do not have the world on your shoulders, and with the relief comes the feeling of loss, bewilderment. You feel small, all the potential strength you had dissolved in an instant. It remains only you with your limits and the awareness that Atlas the world on his shoulders in the end had it as a punishment, otherwise with the cock that he chose to carry the globe on his back. Every now and then the lump in the throat returns, the breath stops in small moments of panic in which you just try to get a little air into the lungs. I feel suffocated by the weight of all the things I haven’t done.

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