I CAN’T SAY MANY THINGS

I don’t say.
Sometimes I breathe hard and I wait for everything to pass.
I don’t ask,
I wait for everything to stop,
for the wind and the storm to arrive.
I don’t say.
I do not tell of how many hells I have had and how many times I have drowned.
And they weren’t bathtubs.
And they weren’t toilets.
They were tomatoes from kitchen dinners with screams and destruction.
They were emotions that I was trying to restrain.
He was a monster that I was trying not to let out.
Words to forget everything that has happened,
at the entrance,
or in the bedroom, dawns, tears,
screams and more screams.
I have no respect for human beings.
I love monsters because I know they are monsters.
The human being, on the other hand,
always has too many nasty surprises.

7 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Ashley
    Aug 06, 2022 @ 15:11:07

    We are each unique with our own nightmares, our own screams, and yet within us all there is tenderness and love. πŸ€—πŸ€πŸŒΉπŸ™‹β€β™‚οΈ

    Reply

    • Fairy Queen
      Aug 07, 2022 @ 12:12:21

      Today is a special day. I’m doing decluttering. I am throwing away many things, many memories, many troublesome thoughts. I have to reorganize my spaces, my life, my future. And knowing that the bad future 3 gives me more energy. I now do not hope to be able to do anything in the future because they are already destroying the future. All the trees and nature will be just a recorph. How can I live without thinking about this destruction? Every time they cut down a tree, I suffer. And I look at these human beings who rule and destroy everything. πŸ˜žπŸ€•πŸ˜°

      Reply

  2. GirlieOnTheEdge
    Aug 06, 2022 @ 16:15:37

    Then how helpful would it be to have a way to “understand”?
    Understanding. Important always. For those like us, non?

    Tools. I love them. If I may be so bold? To share what I’ve called my “go to life tool”? I shouldn’t presume, based on reading some of your pieces, you would be remotely interested yet a part of me laughs at my persistence.
    My longtime “reference”, vehicle for trying to understand people – their behavior, their motivations, blah, blah, blah…is the Wakefield Doctrine, the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers. https://wakefielddoctrine.com/
    (shit, damn. can’t believe I’m leaving this comment. wtf. I am)

    Reply

    • Fairy Queen
      Aug 07, 2022 @ 12:06:56

      Shit, damn, while you were writing this comment I was burning all my stories in the barbecue. Today there had to be something else on the barbecue and instead I put my stories, printed sheets, many beautiful piles ready for the fire and they are all ash. I had to renew myself, change, become useless. Because being useful and doing good has only brought me suffering. God must forgive me for this nonsense, for being such a useless creature. My sister has never read a book of mine, not even my mother, not even all the others. None of my family has ever read anything of mine. I had a shit family.

      Reply

  3. Tony "T-Bird" Burgess
    Aug 06, 2022 @ 21:42:03

    Human beings can scare the hell out of anyone.

    Reply

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