I DIDN’T KNOW REALITY

I have lived for half of my life in my art world. Then I got out and discovered reality. Unfortunately for me, not knowing the rules, I didn’t know how to behave, so I was always spontaneous, sincere, without ulterior motives. Instead I had to learn that reality is artificial and that people are almost always constructed and false. I had to suffer criticism because I am too “sociable, open, convivial, affectionate ..” Think about how a person who always has everything with his heart and hears certain things can be. So they explained to me that I have to follow certain behaviors to be accepted by people, people who are all cold, detached, always with a mask and not at all spontaneous. I refused, rather I am alone with my dog ​​and my books. We wrote, sang and danced and the inevitability of the black future was tangible. We looked too far away. We didn’t touch a drop, no substance but our minds were so full of things that we were unstoppable and unstoppable. At night we wandered into philosophical discussions and our intent was not to explain things but to express our experiences. We went to the most unknown alleys of Palermo, wandering in search of wonderfully unknown corners. We sighed as if we were in love with the air itself. How can one continue to live after having touched eternity? How can we expect a future that was invisible to us? We were our infinity.

WRITING

We ebook writers are not considered. Not only are ebooks still a small slice of the publishing market but they are also marginalized when it comes to large publishing. We are not valued, we are not interviewed, we are not really considered, despite our valid presence in the field of female fiction. It is absurd that in 2020 ebooks are still outside the publishing environment and competitions. When I read about some expensive creative writing courses I feel like screaming. I was for a short internship at Holden where I discovered “The Book Industry” and I refused to be part of it. I could have had contracts with big publishers but I said no. I could also have had the “push” from Camilleri, my fellow countryman, but I also refused this. And all this to help small publishers who have never even thanked me. I fight against the windmills every day because I’m not on facebook, I’m not on twitter, I’m not on intagram and tik tok … practically I don’t exist except on wordpress where I manage blogs. I’ve never written for money. I have not agreed to advertise on my blogs and I have never asked anyone to review me and I have never advertised myself. I’m naive in a world of hungry wolves trying to excel. And I see every day that people no longer reads many books, no longer leaves the house, does not want real relationships but only virtual ones and I … I am the opposite of this and I am isolated for my different ideas.

I HAVEN’T SEEN “LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL”

I have not seen “Life is beautiful”. And I have not seen “The boy in the striped pajamas”. Do you know why? After seeing “Shindler’s List” I was sick for 3 months. I was in Palermo. I went to Zen and left there all my books, my jewels, my paintings, my clothes, everything I owned. I’ve never told anyone. I managed to get into Zen because I was dressed like a gypsy (they control everything). When I was a little girl and I saw a movie “Amazonia” during the break I went out of the cinema, went to a shop, bought some make-up, went back to the cinema, went to the bathroom and put on my make-up like an Indios. At the end of the film everyone was looking at me as if they had seen an alien. I lay badly for months and months. I wrote desperate letters to the president of Brazil, I wrote to the Pope, many letters that have never been answered. Certain films, about certain truths, make me snap something, and I risk my life. I do absurd things. After seeing “American Sniper” I bought a ticket for Iraq and had to leave. Except that I have health problems and my doctor told me that I would go to die without my drugs. I cannot know of some suffering otherwise I feel too bad and do unthinkable things. When I was 4 they abused me for a long time, and so I know what it feels like when you get great pain. It’s not up to me, I can’t get rid of it.

WHEN A RELATIONSHIP FAILS

I’m not a huge fan of the idea that men and women are fundamentally different in what they value and how they approach relationships.
To me, the ‘men are from Mars, women are from Venus’ mindset seems as outdated and irrelevant a way to understand men as ‘The Rules’ – the ones that say you should never call a guy, never accept a Saturday date after Wednesday, and in general, play hard to get. Both of them stem from books that were on the bestseller list more than twenty years ago; haven’t we come a long way since then?
Here’s the thing, though. The Rules work. And many men really do operate on a totally different playing field than women do, when it comes to relationships. As much as I’d like to deny it, and not to pigeonhole men and the way they behave, it’s true that there are certain things about men that seem to be true across the board. If you try to deny it, you’re likely to end up frustrated, with a string of failed relationships to show for it.
I’m not saying you have to subscribe to every theory out there about how men and women.

https://shesaid.com/understand-men-relationships-doomed-fail/

DONNA TART-THE GOLDFINCH

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