I can’t really explain the pain I feel. I can only tell you that I try to live but this life is really not for me. I swing from moments of extreme anger to moments when I have no reason not to throw myself off the balcony. road without hoping to be hit, I don’t light something without hoping to die from electrocution, I don’t take medicine without hoping to die of an overdose, I don’t smoke or drink without hoping that that substance will kill me. ‘is no one with whom I can share my weight.My head and body are so far apart, I have the heart that every second that passes an extra crack, I have a thousand thoughts that I try to escape but lethally devour me every part of I don’t see reasons for just another breath and the more in vain I try to find reasons not to go, the more the world or life gives me some to really leave. I try, but maybe for some life is not, I’m sorry to disappoint those who perhaps still believed in me. I can’t really stay, if they asked me why are you so sad? he is distant and I die waiting. I loved you, and how real are the tears that now would like to fall from my eyes, how real are my absent and dull looks, how real are panic attacks, how real is the commitment that I put into it, so it is always was my love for you or for you true. I leave my place in this life to someone else, I do not deserve or want to live it. I have become just an empty shell that walks and breathes. I died long ago, my soul died long ago. I’m not a princess, he won’t trigger him to save me, he really won the bad this time around.

My sensitivity is my gift and my cross. Where the many are barred, I am allowed to feel. I feel the shades of the soul and I see its colors. My wonder of a wildflower and I cry in front of the sea. I see no heart for the scar and no tears for tears. I feel joy and pleasure, pain and suffering. This is my gift, this is my cross. Music has taught me to be curious. A love cannot take something away from you. Those who say they sacrificed themselves for love make me laugh. Too bad for them. Fears are needed. It is not useful to chase them away. I’m afraid that fear will paralyze me one day. This yes. But it doesn’t just apply to me. It scares me that it could happen to anyone. ou, queen of few words, heal my soul. Let the darkness peacefully lull her into the day. Luminous Queen, common point between distant souls, let me free myself from the chains of distance that men have not yet been able to destroy. Let him be able to rock me one more night, and another. And if you can’t leave us together, enlighten us also tonight and cradle and our souls that meanwhile dance a nostalgic waltz on the edge of the precipice of human will. And let this dance be eternal. Let at least our souls be together, distant queen.


As we lay on the bed you suddenly asked me what I thought about the love between Romeo and Juliet. The awareness of absolute and immortal love, I answered dryly. As the protagonists embody the same essence of love. I remember that my teacher used this sentence that I could not explain … if I had to explain love it is just like that and from that moment that sentence explained well by another person (because I could not do it, there I could) remained inside me. The teacher took the words out of my mouth. Matching feelings is not what kind of family you have … a person is important for who they are. Too bad, however, that this is not understood by everyone. Overwhelming love, free in a certain sense, passionate, spontaneous, pure and true but also suffered. For love we suffer. Certain bonds you feel them inside and that’s it and you are the same essence of the love that I possess.
I wake up with a start and find you there … Bound by a thousand chains .. And I find myself looking at my hand hiding a key .. That passion that would simply like to belong … That life that you fill my thoughts … That life that fills my spaces … That sweet gaze is profound … That has now dissolved my every will … My every barrier … Making me attentive to a particular … Love is not chains … But it’s trust .. Freedom .. Respect … Love .. A simple word … But that can be the cause of excruciating suffering … There is a remedy for physical pain .. The scars heal … But to the heart … Where emotions and feelings are the masters … That wound .. It will remain open .. until it gets you to experience that feeling of nothing .. That feeling of emptiness .. That feeling of inadequacy .. That only the heart … but above all the soul can filter … Because nothing is nobody has the right to turn off our heart … The passion .. The love … The life that is part of it .. They are an immense and precious asset .. Now give me your hand and give me your power .. Let’s fight together .. For the heart .. For love … Because each of us deserves happiness ..

Human relationships are feeble cords. I don’t believe in destiny, but in the indeterminate law of chaos: a week ago I met two tourists who were next to me on the vaporetto just a few days earlier. I don’t think they noticed, I remembered them and I will never see them again. Who knows how many people we meet, how many we let go without trying further, how many hold back against our will, how many instead you would like to weave thicker cords and yet no, you can’t. We should accept the situation and go further and yet it is complicated. Have I climbed over death and can’t I get over this? Perhaps all of this is difficult for me, because it is a period that I feel the desire for stimulating human relationships. For me, finding one is so rare that I can’t accept failure, after having found one that I thought was one. Also, the refusal for not being considered as stimulating. Although painful, this is also an experience. Fruitful or not, we’ll see. Meanwhile, I still think about it.

%d bloggers like this: