The dysfunctional family is a family in which conflicts, deviant behavior and abuse predominate. Each of these families lives in fear and the weakest members are constantly subjected to physical and psychological violence.
In these family models, authority is replaced by a distorted idea of authority that is exercised through manifestations of anger, the need for control and aggression.
We remember how families and couples, as well as every single individual on earth, by nature and evolutionary processes face what we call a "period of crisis". Carl Whitaker, pioneer of systemic family therapy, identifies various crises within the couple. One of these occurs when the two partners realize that the other will never become what they wanted to become and that they will never be able to completely change it. To this crisis are added others, such as those marked by specific events, such as the birth / growth / education of children, bereavement, serious illness. And it is enough to observe the period in which we live to realize the drama in which all these aspects can convey
To date, the first test we had to overcome was to completely change our habits: the transition from hectic daily activities to immobility, stopped and blocked in confined spaces, for days and days, was not easy. And the awareness that today this will not end as soon as we all hope can make it even less bearable. So we have to deal, within those domestic walls, with the management of what have become only long and interminable days to fill. Everything that relieves us from coming into contact with us, our emotions, reflections on our own self, is now outside (friends, sports, holidays and travel, .. et al.). And the isolation in which we find ourselves, full of continuous disastrous news on the progress of the pandemic, can only be a further sharpener of emotions such as fears, anxieties and depressions.
It can be useful to start the day taking care of us, of our person, of our spaces especially if shared with 2 or 3 people of the family unit, and even more if we consider the units in which there are also grandparents or uncles and if the spaces they are reduced;
You can discover a new way of preparing yourself towards yourself and the new time available, dedicating yourself to activities for which we did not have time before (cooking, gardening, bricolage, et.al.). All this can be an opportunity compared to a new way of placing oneself within the family space and discovering a new relational dimension;
With children it can be useful, bearing in mind the differences for age groups, to maintain a daily routine as much as possible, to be recreated totally new as we have tried to do with ourselves: the day can be spent alternating playful moments with recreational moments , to play spaces and free exploration, to moments of sharing with the family.
Educating men. The problem is that women who bring up their children are often anaffective, natcisist, ambivalent and selfish. In recent times in many families the woman is an example of unbridled materialism, hunger for success and extreme narcissism. Many children are literally abandoned to their grandparents or uncles because the young parents are busy in their hectic life on social media. Mothers who are divided between videos on instagram and tik tok, sitting in beauty centers and running for shopping. Fathers glued to chats where they sneak up on half-naked girls, looking for the most daring encounters. So what can children receive from these individuals taken only by themselves and their selfish desires? They do not receive any affection and therefore as soon as they find someone to attach themselves to they become possessive and obsessive. Because for them that woman becomes the center of their world that has been empty. And when the woman becomes aware of such oppressive feelings, it is too late. And if by chance he tries to leave the man, he will take revenge in a negative way. So these men who grew up with absent mothers become too present and pressing. Mothers themselves create these insensitive monsters. Mothers themselves no longer know how to educate their children because they are busy advertising themselves. And the cases of femicides increase because there are so many children who grow up mistreated and rejected by narcissistic mothers. What have women become? Materialistic and obsessed with success. Unfortunately, the cause of a bad education of males is the women themselves. 😟
THE PRODIGY OF IDEAS 