You don't start over, just like that ... straight away.
Like one morning you open your eyes and magically you have forgotten everything.
No, that's not how important changes work.
It starts again in pieces.
One morning you opened your eyes and a piece of that anger went away; then you lose a little bit of interest the next day and the next day you wake up again and start thinking about it after lunch, it's no longer your first thought in the morning.
The questions, those you never lose: what you lose is the desire to know the answers.
You start over one piece at a time, so at the beginning you seem to always stay where you are.
But don't worry: a little bit of that weight you carry on you is gone even today.
I love coming home after the holidays. Because at home, I will be able to sleep peacefully without neighbors who shout late on their balcony. In my house I can swim without sharing the pool with other people. But above all I will be able to see my treasures, my loves, my wonderful puppies: Valkirya and Spritz. I love coming home from vacation because my home is the most comfortable place for me, the place where I have all my things in their place, and I always find them.And here we are back home. We look around and see books, exams, school, work, which have been waiting for us all summer long. We went to the beach, we laughed, we ran, we practiced sports that we will never do again, we made new friends, found old ones, found new loves, we had so much fun, so much to forget, we sometimes drank too much, sometimes too little, we slept, we saw the sun rise and we saw the stars fall, we saw village festivals, heard religious choirs and stadium choirs, we listened to music too loud. We made promises we didn’t keep, we went out of windows and balconies because the doors were too loud, we sang and danced. We brought out the best in us !!! But, after having lived all this, with what desire do you sit back in a chair, grab a pen again or put on your tie again? The smile is always on the lips and if the memory is so funny it also happens that you escape a laugh, the distraction is at least in my case it is always lurking. Yet I can not hate the book in front of me and which in theory is separating me from the last days of summer. Oh no, because even if for now this seems a difficult task to face I understand, or rather I force myself to believe that all these efforts will lead to something one day. And then you know, without the bitter, my friend, the sweet is not so sweet.Every trip is an experience and no experience is ever useless, everything serves to teach you something if you have the patience and the ability to receive the message. Goodbye, sea, until I know how to better appreciate what you have to offer, see you the day when I will be able to enjoy your beauty without looking for it elsewhere and your rhythms without suffering its slowness. The holidays officially end today for me. Ok, I’m lucky that I’ve had several days at home, of course, but tomorrow we go back and say that I don’t have half of starting over even comes close to describing the little desire I have to resume. But you have to. In spite of some colleague objectively, humanly and professionally useless, of the various problems and of everything that concerns working, I am well aware of my luck. Except that experiencing my ideal life, that is the perfect tourist, for two weeks has a negative side: that I get used to it. Netflix, cats, reading, time to do whatever I can think of … in short, the perfect life that I would give myself if I could not have to work. But I’m not rich enough, so we’re always there, back to square one. Tomorrow we start again. Once I got angry and struggled like a fish already caught on a hook that tries anyway and pathetically to free itself. It’s different now. Now I am resigned. The life I want, I can’t have it. Like almost everyone in the world, so shut up.Two weeks went by like hours, but it took me a lot, it took a lot. I took my mind off everything as it hadn’t happened for some time, I focused on us, on our little holiday, on the holidays and on the family. And I understood many things, I think we have grown on all fronts, first of all the importance of having you by my side and the desire for a life together with you. Because it is true that after all this time a sentence like this seems almost banal, but you are a little bit my compass, you are my point of reference for everything. And no, maybe we won’t be perfect, (I have the big nose, you have the hips, because that’s what really matters!), But I love a little more even in the same since you are here. You made me discover a new world, you made me a child again and at the same time we are growing up together. And beyond everything, my life is perfect, complete since you are here.
As a young girl I imagined a different future and being an artist (I don’t get high or smoke or drink, I’m an atypical artist I know) I thought that my skills, both artistic and intellectual (I always had excellent grades in school) would have me taken far, in every sense. I have always dreamed of a life off the cursed island, Sicily, because as soon as I grew up a little and became old enough to understand certain social dynamics, I felt suffocated in my aspirations. My parents wanted me to finish school, find a rich husband and get married and churn out grandchildren for them. Instead I didn’t do any of this. I have not followed any rules of social life that tradition imposed. Immediately after high school I went abroad to pursue my artistic dream but I was forced to return because my mother was sick and I took on my responsibilities as a daughter and still do it today and in return I do not receive than criticisms and always negative judgments. In part you are right, I have not been able to get even the minimum of what I aspired to in my artistic life but on the other hand I have a situation that everyone envies me. Of course, after having understood how things are going, after having discovered that “either you follow the rules of the market or you stay out of every field”, the choice to continue on the difficult and fruitless path of art is truly crazy. But I can’t turn my back on myself and my fantasy, and especially in recent times if I hadn’t had all these dreams with me yet, I think I wouldn’t have been able to go on. Sometimes instead I say to myself, trying to convince myself, that it would have been better not to have these dreams at all and not to have all these creative abilities, since up to now they have not brought me anything concrete because I do not compromise for any reason and I do not I want to sleep with anyone to get credit. This crisis due to covid pays for itself first of all precisely those sectors of genres that are considered unnecessary, and art is one of them. Certainly having a nice painting hanging on the wall does not fill people’s stomachs so even I would not feel like convincing someone to buy a painting rather than buying groceries. First of all, I myself have had to give up those beautiful things that make life more pleasant (dinners out, accessories, hairdressing, cinema, theater, concerts, cosplay fairs, …) and so why shouldn’t others give it up too ?! The covid spared no one. So what’s the point of creating so many beautiful things if they have to remain closed in a box or drawer? Being an art therapist seems nonsense. Working with autistic children seems inconsistent. Yet it requires a lot of patience and a lot of control. But I never talk about my passion for saving children.
Yesterday’s awakening was a bad awakening for Mattia’s young farm … Millions of dead bees and broken houses. An entire apiary destroyed by someone who took it out on defenseless animals, killing them, crushing them or freezing them from the pouring rain. It took months, perhaps years of care and work to prepare the bees in strength and health for the spring harvest, which was nullified overnight. This serious damage in the first days of flowering of the acacia will not be easily overcome, especially in this complex phase. Despite so much pain and discomfort, we need to find the strength not to give up and try to start again. Thanks to those who are expressing their solidarity with messages of support and those who want to concretely demonstrate it with a donation:
The manual world of practical skills is valued more than the mental world. Manual skills are appreciated by all. While mental abilities are underestimated and considered useless. Many of you who work with PCs or do mind-active jobs will know that many consider these jobs to be “comfortable” and almost trivial. On the other hand, practical professions are considered more essential and are valued more (and also with greater earnings. Mental professions such as writing a film or entering data or building graphics or preparing a lesson or discovering a new star are considered non-essential. the plumber, the electrician, the bricklayer, the mechanic … are considered essential and very important. Even those who have knowledge in these fields are valued more than those who make artistic or computer professions. It is no coincidence that there are even derogatory nicknames about these mental professions as: artist and nerd and mad scientist. While for the practical professions there is no derogatory. So in this society even if a good 70% of the population does mental work (since technology has also replaced many practical actions) the remaining 30% is considered more important.
It’s just a question of survival. Just this. There is nothing else. All with the same purpose. Nothing is really what it seems. Looking for someone. Find someone. And then endure, suffer and suffer for work, for food, for children, for something wrong, because there is always something wrong. Why don’t you eat with love. What life would this be? We might as well tear ourselves apart like wolves instead of gradually wounding ourselves in the same place. If there is no food, the aggression of human beings comes out. If no resources are found, we all become ferocious wolves. We are animals and not evolved beings. We are still guided by our biology. We have hormones that make us do things we later regret. But we can’t cancel these hormones. Animals adapt better than humans. They don’t have to match clothes or wear makeup. They just need to show mane or feathers. They don’t have to get hold of various trappings to show their role. Human beings waste a lot of energy to earn money and show themselves in a certain way. And the whole is built. I mean that animals show what they have naturally had. Human beings, on the other hand, show what they got with money. The adaptation is therefore more complicated because it requires the use of more resources. Human beings rely on beauty but women choose money. If we put Briatore and any handsome young man with him would you choose? Briatore. Many guys recently call themselves Incel and have focused on their ugliness as a yardstick for their failure with women. But they did not understand that women look at money and not at the face. If a man shows up in a fancy suit or expensive car and designer clothes and a lot of money rest assured that most of the girls will say okay. The girls of this generation obviously, because that of the previous generation were satisfied with a man with a steady job. Now, however, the girls want the absolute rich.
THE PRODIGY OF IDEAS 