THE NARCISISTIC WOMAN

The narcissistic woman can present herself as the perfect woman and partner: intelligent, cultured, brilliant, attentive, kind, determined to fulfill herself, dedicated both to work and to the couple and to the family, but she can also present herself as fragile and as a victim to be saved. After the first phase of idyll in which the partner is idealized as special, anger, dissatisfaction, constant criticism, devaluation, emotional blackmail using the sense of guilt, punishment if he does not get what he wants. Jealousy, arrogance, vindictiveness emerge, the constant need for confirmation of being special. However, unlike the narcissist man who tends to suddenly become repulsive, the woman, while launching continuous recriminations and criticisms, continues to demand affection and attention, making it more difficult for the other person to extricate himself from the feelings of guilt, from the doubt of being emotionally inadequate. and not to give enough.
The narcissistic woman, just like the narcissistic man, weaves her web through affective manipulation, often using her very seductive aspect: she knows how to choose her victim in her greatest moment of need and every man can be attracted to her bewitching " song of the sirens ". At the beginning, therefore, she becomes the savior of the man / victim by nourishing his desire to feel important and esteemed: he covers the man with attention, fills his inner and emotional voids, making him feel invincible; induces him, in a subtle and suggestive way, to take "steps longer than his leg", destined for sure failure as they do not adhere to a given reality, but are artfully conceived with the sole intent of feeding the man / victim through the reinforcement of an ideal and grandiose self-image.
The narcissist is almost always manipulative, capable of establishing ambiguous relationships and bonds just to have financial support, power and gifts. He often looks for men who are insecure, clueless, inexperienced and virgin. She seduces them by making them believe she is a beautiful princess, a queen, a beautiful lady, who only wants to give love. Instead, look for victims to get money and gifts from.

She is convinced that she is great and unique, a special being, deeply envied, the holder of the truth. It requires continuous proofs of love and recognition and reads the reality around it, even the most authentic, with Machiavellian malice.
She becomes deeply entangled and tries to change the man in all his essential characteristics, deepening in him a pervasive and pervasive sense of inadequacy.

He is never enough and never does enough, he is certainly not a real man, he does not correspond to how he should be and he never corresponds to her ideal. She doesn't like anything about him and the criticism involves all aspects: his work, his family, his status.

The relationship becomes an earthquake whose epicenter is her unhappiness due to his inadequacy and the unfortunate's attempts to respond adaptively to high demands.

It is a relationship centered on great events and great dramas: betrayals, interruptions and reunions even when everything seemed highly compromised.
She always has other men, in addition to the chosen victim, which she uses to get money, paid bills, jewelry, gifts, beauty treatments, ... because to maintain her seductive appearance she must always resort to beauty centers to always show herself perfect and desirable. Thus the man-victim will not be able to help but desire it.
Narcissistic women (in the overt version) are bright, extroverted, interesting women, very focused on themselves, their physical appearance, their fulfillment and their goals; apparently they do not seem anaffective, cold and calculating, indeed often, they are perfectionist women, who dedicate themselves to the couple and the family, in such an obsessive way, as to be attentive to even the slightest defect of the other, always ready to reproach it, if , this defect may disregard their expectations as a woman or as a mother.

However, as in the case of men, the narcissistic woman never enters into intimacy with the other (avoidance of intimacy), does not want to show herself fragile, cannot lose, cannot lower herself, cannot risk compromising herself in the relationship. authentic with the other, for this reason the other must become as you believe that an ideal man should be.
It can be more difficult for a man to go and ask for help from a therapist, because there are still present prejudices towards this professional figure. Furthermore, man complains less about his problems, often avoiding to affirm that they exist, he is ashamed to admit to being a victim, preferring to withdraw into himself.
The other is perceived as an object rather than a subject with which to relate and in this sense, a pure instrument of self-satisfaction. In fact, she dominates man, even if she deceives him that it is the opposite. She makes him fall madly in love, binds him to himself with almost non-existent sexual relations, so that he desires her more and more, humiliating himself and giving many gifts to try to convince him to love her. But the narcissistic woman plays the part of the unattainable queen, sovereign of desires, and the man becomes her doormat. The trouble is that the man is lucky to have the attention of such a beautiful woman and therefore does not realize that he is being exploited and used.

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